Next?

  Finally today came and tests were completed with a wonderful result... negative bone scan and chest x-rays!!! Alleluia. Dr. Murray did not yet have the results of the CT scan and will get in touch with me next week. He said if I don't hear from him all is good.
Walking through M.D. Anderson is like nothing I have ever experienced. Every person you meet, no matter what their station is at this facility, looks you in the eye and smiles and aknowledges you. I'm talking about every housekeeper, nurse, doctor, clerk, cafeteria worker, guard, volunteer, etc. It's remarkable. Nobody is looking down. Most places, especially busy places like a hospital,, people are running hither and yonder and do not take the time to look at the person(s) they are passing in the hallway. M.D. Anderson, although as busy as a mall at Christmas time, hosts people that show they have hearts for their fellow human beings. What a wonderful place to land. Not one time did I hear any patient, and there are hundreds upon hundreds in the waiting rooms with me, mention anything about Friday the 13th. Even the most advanced patients have hope in their eyes. My heart wrenched for the pain and suffering I saw all around me yet knew that God has His eyes on each and every one of them.
    Dr. Murray held back no punches when telling me of the side effects I will have while taking the chemotherapy. On our way back to Katy, 5 minutes after leaving M.D. Anderson, I found silent tears rolling down my face when talking to Dolores about shaving my head to avoid dealing with clumps falling out. I was ready to do it right then and there. We talked about it and knew it to be an emotional Patti talking and that I had a couple of weeks to make this decision. Surgery to place the medi port in my chest and the first chemo treatment is scheduled for January 26th. (90% chance that the chemo will begin on that date pending bloodwork that was sent off.) At a stop light she held me and said a thankful prayer for the good news of the tests. Talk about ground me fast!!! So much for my pity party.
   I am thankful that Barry is on his way home as I type and will be there when I arrive tommorrow afternoon. There are decisions and information that I must share with him. I am thankful that I will get to spend time with mom, Holly, and my grandkids Sunday to celebrate my twin grandson's 12th birthdays that were on the 10th and my 56th which is on Sunday. What a blessing this will be!!!
  Being upset about the side effects I am to face shamed me in light of the great news I received about the bone scan!!! (Dolores' prayer set that in motion.)I realize it is human but asked myself out loud: If I was willing to give control to God and total trust to God with my test results....then why am I making such a fuss about being bald? Why was I worried about the other side effects? Again, reminding me of just how fickle I can be when faced with fear. I thank Him for His grace and forgiveness of all my human weaknesses. He is here now with me just as He has always been and I am so so happy for His prescence.
   Thank you all for your prayers and thoughts. Be patient with me as I am learning to be patient with myself.
Love
Patti