God's Fingerprints

Last Thursday, while running through the hoops at M.D. Anderson for my initial appointments, I was carrying with me the radiology films and DVDs of all my mammograms and biopsies. I was told by all concerned that I was to guard them with my life...no film... no appointment. I'd have to start the process all over again. Well, about 10:30 PM Thursday evening, I realized that I did not have the HUGE envelope containing the films. Emotions were high....quite high. I thank God that Dolores was here as she wrapped her arms around my sobbing shoulders and prayed for me. Cancer has a way of taking little tiny things and making them huge in my mind. I called these HUGE events... melt downs...episodes. I was looking for something else to call them...something unique to me. That is when a dear friend in Christ sent me the FROG  - Forever Rely on God. (Since I am a frog collector in my classroom - fake..not real, I thought this fitting.) She also said to look at these FROG moments as opportunities to grow and to minister to others from my growth. So... these events...once known as melt downs and/or episodes... are O-FROGs. Opportunities to Forever Rely on God.
   Back to the lost films.... if I may: Several emails and panicky phone calls later to M. D. Anderson, I made a trip down to the clinic, paid the $15 parking, and 30 minutes later walked out empty handed. On my way back to Dolores' home, it hit me.... I'm $15 poorer, physically and mentally fried, and God wanted me to trust in Him. He asked me, "Are you ready to let go of this now?"
   This morning, Monday, I received a call from Cathy Brown saying these exact words, "Mrs. Steele. This is Cathy Brown, Dr. Murray's nurse. I wanted to tell you that when I walked in this morning the envelope containing all your films were sitting on my desk. I have no idea how they got there." I laughed and told her that I knew exactly how they got there and if she looked real close she'd see God's fingerprints left behind. I told her that He was waiting to see just how long it would take me to let go. LOL. HE is always working in the circumstances. I love Him so deeply.
He was preparing me for this trip for few years when He turned me to face Him and put the hunger in me for a relationship with Christ. Without this relationship, I could never have even thought about surviving this path laid out before me. Alleluia. Thank you Father.